How to Celebrate Valentine’s Day!

Tell/show all your loved ones how much they mean to you.
Valentine’s Day is a great day to tell everyone in your life how much you appreciate them. Valentine’s Day cards aren’t just for elementary school or significant others. Buy some flowers for your mom. Write a thoughtful card for your roommate. Treat your friends to some chocolate. Remind your brother that no matter how much you torment him, you love him, really.

Watch cute movies.
Personal faves-Never Been Kissed, 10 Things I Hate About You, You’ve Got Mail, When Harry Met Sally.

Enjoy your time with loved ones – be it boyfriend, girlfriend, parents, siblings, or friends. Have a Galentines Day (like me!) if you’re single. Have a romantic night with your partner. Enjoy a family movie night watching Rom-Coms. Just enjoy yourself! Valentine’s Day is about love, and you should love yourself first and foremost!

Get a cute manicure or have a spa day.
We’re lucky that Valentine’s Day falls on a Sunday this year- take advantage of the day off and experience ultimate relaxation!

Eat chocolate covered strawberries.
Just do it. Yummm.

On Valentine’s we wear pink!
Enjoy the opportunity to dress up and do cute make-up (if that’s your thing). I usually wear black or other darker colors, so I like to take the chance on Valentine’s to wear pink and red and accessorize with hearts and play around with my makeup!

Take advantage of all the sweets going on sale.
Valentine’s Day is great! You know what else is great? The day after Valentine’s Day! Yay chocolate! Also, a little inside scoop for you- Target puts all of their Valentine’s Day stuff half-off the day after Valentine’s… which means half priced plates, napkins, kitchenware, mugs, decorations… treat yourself to some sale shopping!

My New Years Resolution!

I have one New Years Resolution, and that is to be healthy, both mentally and physically.

But there are a lot of elaborations to this resolution- so I thought I would put it up on the blog so you guys can hold me accountable! Plus, I’ll now be able to go back and revisit this post throughout the year if I’m in need of reminders or motivation.

So first- be healthy mentally.

For me, this means getting on top of my anxiety disorder. It’s no secret that I take medication for my anxiety disorder, because medication works for me. It’s not the answer for everyone, but it has worked super well for me. However, that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t benefit from talking to someone and getting help in dealing with my disorder and, hopefully, get a better understanding of my disorder and learn how to cope with it, eventually without medicine, if possible. So that’s the first part of this resolution- seek professional help in order to beat this disorder.

This one also means being more present in my day-to-day life. I often get lost in the inner-workings of the internet, fandom, tv, etc. I spend a lot of time thinking about fandom and tumblr and getting super emotional about my favorite tv shows and waste the day on twitter and instagram and, again, tumblr. And I think I would really benefit from being more present in my life, living in the real world a bit more (although there’s not wrong with enjoying a bit of fandom and internet). But I think I could tone it back more and spend more time with friends, exploring the city, reading, exercising, etc. So that’s what I aim to do this year- better manage my time and balance my obsession with the digital world with a more healthy approach to the real world.

One to the second part of my resolution- be healthy physically.

This one is pretty self-explanatory. I just got a Fitbit for Christmas, so I want to continue getting at least 10,000 steps a day, and 60 minutes of physical activity every day. I’d also like to join a gym and really start getting back in shape. Basically, I want to get my body back, pre-desk job. And then keep improving my physical health even more once I reach that goal.

The great thing about physical health is that it ties in with mental health, so by improving my physical health, I’ll also be helping improve my mental health. Win, win!

And that is my New Years Resolution this year! What are you goals for the new year? I don’t know about you guys, but 2015 was a great year for me, so 2016 has a lot to live up to!

Happy New Year!

 

People Kinda Suck… But Sometimes They Don’t!

My advice this week is basically me preaching to myself, because this is something that I need to practice a lot more.

Try to see the good in people.

It is so easy to get caught up and overwhelmed by how much people suck. Especially in a city like New York where you interact with sooooo many people (co-workers, roommates, strangers, friends) every single day, and can therefore have even more negative interactions.

I see it every day, without fail. Someone is rude or yells at you or honks their horn at you or shoves into you on the sidewalk or says something demeaning… the list goes on and on. And it’s so easy for me to just sigh and proclaim, “people suck.”

It can really affect my mood sometimes, and make me want to just stay at home with my cat and not want to face the world or build relationships with people, because I have this constant niggling thought that people suck and only think of themselves and will ultimately let you down.

But that’s not really a healthy way to think, is it? Even though I experience it every day and see it all the time and it’s hard to forget, I shouldn’t let it get to me. You should definitely learn from negative experiences and interactions with others, and be careful with your trust and building relationships, but you should also remember that there is good in people, too. For every bad egg you bump into, you also have a great friend to balance that out. Sometimes I get so caught up in how much people suck and how much I hate people and by how many people were jerks to me that day, that I forget all the amazing and positive people in my life. It is so easy to let negativity cloud your thoughts, and it can be so hard to remember and call on happy thoughts when that happens. But you have to pause when you’re upset and just reflect on the good things and people and experiences in your life. It’s what keeps you going.

So focus on the good instead of the bad. And focus on making yourself one of the good guys, who lifts another person’s spirits instead of dragging them down. This goes back to my advice post from a while back about being selfless. Put others first every once and a while to remind them that there are still good people in the world. And, if you’re lucky, someone will do the same for you and remind you the same.

The world has got some crappy people in it. The news is overcrowded with horror stories and tragedy. But don’t lose sight of all the good in the world. It’s there if you know where to look.

Don’t Stop Writing

I haven’t written an advice post in over a month! I feel like I owe you guys one! All of the advice posts that I’ve previously written are ones that I was particularly motivated to write, so it was so easy to sit down and just get it all out. There’s nothing really pounding in my mind at the moment that I just really want to get out. I have a few drafts that I’ve started, but nothing that is flowing from me.

So, my advice for you today is one for writers. And it’s one that’s been told to me time and time again and I’m sure every writer will have heard it before, but it bears repeating. The best way for writers to get better is by writing. The best practice is by writing. The best way to get over writer’s block is to write. Just keep writing, even if it’s utter crap.

Write your dreams, write what you saw that day, write a daydream you keep having, write about a crazy idea you had, write fanfiction for your favorite tv show, write a whole lot of random stuff until something worth saying starts breaking through. Just don’t stop writing. Because, once you stop, it’s so hard to get that momentum going again. But if you never stopped, then once inspiration hits, it will just flow right out of you.

I haven’t had much to say lately. I haven’t been happy with my blog posts. I’ve started a lot of drafts that never got completed. So I told myself I would take a day or two off from the blog and from writing. That day or two turned into two weeks. It’s so easy to neglect writing once you stop.

Keep writing. Keep pushing on. Keep the flow moving from your head to your fingertips. Because it’s sometimes through those random bits that we write or through these paragraphs of random thoughts that we will hit inspiration.

And I feel like this is the kind of advice that can be applied to all aspects of your life. When you’re not feeling motivated or you’re lacking inspiration or you just don’t feel like continuing on or trying, keep on going anyway. Fake it and try hard and do your best and just keep on keeping on and eventually things will fall into place again.

Love Yourself(ie)!

My advice for you this week is to love yourself(ie)!

I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve seen or heard someone make fun of others for taking selfies. People will laugh at you and call you conceited and judge you and it’s just absolutely ridiculous.

I don’t know about you, but I only take selfies when I’m feeling pretty good about myself. Like when I’m having a good day, or like the outfit I’m wearing, or did a great job with my make-up, or am having a good hair day. I take selfies because, for some reason or other, I feel beautiful that day. So when someone else starts laughing at you or making fun of you because they “caught you” taking a selfie, they’re trying to bring that self-love down! And that’s just not cool.

Raise your hand if you have self-esteem issues?! *raises hand* So when I’m feeling good about myself, why do people insist on trying to contribute to my self-esteem issues that I’m trying to overcome? We’re not in high school anymore (well, some of you may be… in which case, I’M SORRY! IT WILL BE OK!), so the bullying and teasing needs to stop.

Don’t let others get to you. And especially don’t make fun of someone else for feeling positively about themselves. Because when you mock people taking selfies, that’s exactly what you’re doing.

One of the great thing about selfies is that they show that we don’t need validation or compliments from someone else to feel beautiful and know our worth. We take selfies because we know we’re beautiful and we want to capture it. And yeah, we sometimes post selfies because it feels good getting “likes” and “comments.” It adds to the happiness we’re already feeling about ourselves. And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that! Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

So the next time someone tries to make you feel embarrassed about taking a selfie, just roll your eyes and pose, because you are beautiful, and you know it!

photo (2)

Treat Yourself!

5 Easy Steps to Treating Yourself Right/Having the Best Pamper Evening Possible!

Step 1: Take a nice, long shower/bath. Include lots of bubbles and gorgeously scented products (i.e, your favorite candle, a sugary body scrub, a nice bubble bath mixture, bath fizzies, etc). Insert sing-along worthy playlist or TV show for maximum enjoyment. Anything that helps you unwind.

Step 2: Mud mask! While waiting for the mask to work it’s magic, read a light book, watch Netflix, do your nails, browse Twitter… whatever you find relaxing.

Step 3: Eat your favorite dessert.

Step 4: Take a nap/be sure to get a good, long night’s sleep. Rest is so important for being energized and alert every day.

Step 5: Buy yourself something nice. A nice beauty product, a gorgeously scented candle, a dress, a mani/pedi, a massage… ANYTHING! Just make it something you want, not need. Don’t go crazy, but TREAT YOURSELF.

BONUS: Acknowledge that you don’t need someone else to make you happy. You can spoil yourself all on your own. Take this time to remember that you’re worth spoiling, and you are a wonderful person all on your own.

Rise Above It

I’ll be the first to admit that I can get pretty mad. When someone’s rude to me, or being stupid, or does something contradictory or basically commits any of my pet peeves, it just makes me angry. I lash out and get angry and it just boils inside of me. And it’s something I want to work on.

So, my advice for you (and me) this week is to rise above it. Kill them with kindness. Don’t let anyone bring you down or affect your mood. As I said in last week’s post- you can only control yourself. So don’t sweat it when other people are terrible. Most of the time, it has everything to do with them and nothing to do with you.

It’s no secret that I had a rough week last week. I’m sure it was reflected in my blog posts and obvious to anyone who interacted with me in person. The last thing I needed was drama and anger in my life- so, of course, that’s exactly what others tried to push onto me. I’m not one for drama. People who make every little thing into a big, dramatic scene just don’t really make sense to me. But I’ve been forced into a lot of situations like that recently, and it’s been stressing me out, because it’s just not something that I get involved with.

I was so exhausted and stressed last week, that I just didn’t have any more mental capacity for anger. So I let it go. I just dropped it and started being ridiculously nice to these people who were being rude and dramatic and just horrible to me. I showered them with kindness. And they didn’t know what to do with it- so they just ignored me (the best I could ask for in this situation). And I immediately felt better: mentally, physically, emotionally. I didn’t have this rage burning inside of me. I wasn’t as jittery. My mind instantly felt clearer. And I felt a lot of the stress that I was holding onto roll out of me.

Remember- you can’t control what others do or say, but you can control yourself and how you react. So take the high road. Don’t stoop to their level. And don’t take it personally. They’re the ones who have to live with themselves, and you have to live with the person you make yourself into, so make yourself the best possible version of you.

One of my favorite books is T.H. White’s The Once and Future King, and there’s a quote in there that I just love. Next time someone is being rude or dumb, just remember this quote. #sass

“I can see that you spoke in ignorance, and I bitterly regret that I should have been so petty as to take offence where none was intended.”